What I'm Thankful For

Hadley drew this picture for me yesterday. I was first impressed with the sun (she called it a "spider sun") and the border around the picture. I haven't seen her do that before. But then Jesse told her to tell me what she wrote on it. It says, "Mom." The way that it is showing up on this entry, you have to read it top to bottom, but you get the idea. I sure did.


She showed me the letters, "M, O, P, O, M" and then paused for a minute and said, "That's not a P Mama, it's just a circle with a line through it."

And here's what Harper can do:



I don't think I have a good definition of what grace is, but I think about that concept a lot now that I have children. It doesn't seem right that I have Hadley and Harper. And today I am sick. I have what feels like a very sharp knife in my throat. My body aches like I was in a bar fight (if I knew what a bar fight was like). I haven't showered in two days (I look gooooood). I don't feel like myself. But my girls know who I am - they can write and say it - and that seems to be a nice reminder of who created them.

Single Digits

We weren't able to have a decent birthday party for Harper last Monday because we were traveling back from the midwest, so we celebrated Harper's birthday last Friday night. And I haven't had the time to post any pictures or write about it because I've been busy eating bon bons and watching soaps. So please forgive the fact that Harper is almost 1 year and two weeks old as I post this.

We went out to eat on Friday and came home for cake and presents. I made a ginger molasses cake that people seemed to enjoy, and our condo didn't burn down so I consider it a success.

Apparently Harper thought it'd be more fun to take little bits off of her piece and line it up on the tray instead of eating it. She eventually ate the cake, but she likes to check things out before she takes action.

Here's a picture of the birthday girl and her daddy:
And here's some shots of the girls playing with Harper's new kitchen:


This was a little difficult for Hadley to understand that this was Harper's gift as you might imagine. In all fairness, Hadley wants to share but she doesn't always understand the concept. Plus, both of the girls are so hard headed and have this idea of what they want to do, that makes it difficult to play together because the other is constantly getting in the way. So there were some tears, but we all dealt with it. However, Hadley frequently asks before she goes to sleep, "Am I going to have a birthday tomorrow?"

"How can I prepare your eggs for you?"


"Salt makes everything taste better!"
"What do you mean it's time for bed? What am I going to do about the souffle?"
On Harper's birthday I updated my Facebook status saying, "Happy Birthday to my drama queen Harper. I wonder where she gets it from." Getting to know Harper this year is a lesson (and probably a reminder) of the kind of person I am as well. Harper takes her time with everything, and if she doesn't want to do something, she's not going to do it. Under any circumstances.
If she's done eating, she will swat the spoon (full of food) out of her way, usually splattering the wall, table, high chair, a parent, and herself with whatever was being served. She does this without warning. She could be in a good mood or a bad mood. It makes no difference. That's how she says she done.
Harper likes to put tops, lids, caps, on things. She also likes to open and close things. However, if she puts a lid on something and can't open it up, she will SCREAM until someone comes over to help her. Her legs go straight out, her fists clench, the little veins in her neck pop out, and the noise that comes out sounds similar to something out of Jurassic Park. Again, she could be in a good mood or a bad mood. It makes no difference. That's how she says, "I need some assistance, STAT."
Clearly I don't behave this specific way, but what I see that Harper has inherited from me is her extreme lack of patience and her unbridled temper. Some people call it being a "passionate" person, and on our good days, Harper and I are full of passion. But there will be days when we take each other down, and that's why it is good that there are the Hadleys and Jesses of the world. They balance us out (or tune us out), and make us see that there are other ways to express your point then throwing food on the wall.
But Harper is now 1, and I am so proud of all the things she can do: clap her hands, crawl like she's on fire, take her shoes and socks off in a split second, laugh and babble, and most importantly, bring even more personality into our family. She is my girl, and I am thankful that I get to be her mother.

Chicago Is My Kind of Town

Here's a picture of a couple of my favorite things: the Chicago skyline, and my girl Hadley. This was taken at the Shedd Aquarium last week. Hadley, my dad, and I spent the day there looking at the aquatic life. Although, if Hadley were to recall any of it, she'd tell you that her favorite part was playing in the submarine.

This thing was pretty cool, and I'm trying to figure out a way to recreate it in our home (yes, Jesse, you should be a little nervous). Give Hadley anything with buttons on it, or gadgets that you need to push, pull, shift, whatever, and she's a happy camper.



Thankfully, we didn't find the sub until we'd looked around for awhile, and watched the water show which was really fantastic. Here's a picture of the "theater" before the show started:

We got to see penguins, beluga whales, seals, and a couple of hawks. It was really fun to take Hadley to this, because she got a kick out of watching the different animals swim and jump out of the water.

We also saw some stingrays and other fish in the exhibits walking around the museum.

And there was a place where kids could put their hands in the water and touch starfish, etc.


Hadley kept getting annoyed that her hands were getting wet, or that the water would splash on her. Well, kid, that's what happens at sea. This part of the museum was getting me dangerously close to my scuba diving experience off the Great Barrier Reef. I tried to stay calm and not think about breathing under water.

Here's a picture of Hadley and I outside the Aquarium. We are standing in the same spot as my mom and were in another picture that was taken when I was a baby.
Hadley also rode the el during our trip to Chicago. She and my dad road it back and forth between Austin and Forest Park (I think, I can't remember how far they went), and except for the submarine, I think that was a real highlight for Hadley. She is still talking about it.

During our trip to the midwest, we learned that my brother is getting married. Here is how my mom and I took the news:
But can you blame me? This is what she does with her free time:

I mean, I agree that bacon is delicious, but c'mon, Kellee.

I had a chance to visit with a good friend of mine from high school who came in for the weekend because she was up for an award for excellent reporting (she's on the morning show in Madison, WI). She has two kids as well so it was fun to watch the four of them interact. Harper, however, was very fond of their dog. Here she is with one shoe off (I can usually get her to at least wear one), playing with Maddie.


The child hates shoes, but loves dogs. I'm not sure how to relate to that.
The older kids went nuts when Sarah said she had Dora and Diego movies. Here they are huddled around her telling her which one they wanted to watch. I should've taken a video of it because each of them were telling Sarah every detail of their favorite Dora or Diego episode. It was sort of like watching Nick Jr. on speed.

I'll end this post with a shot of two more of my favorite things: the Chicago skyline and my girl Harper.

Yes, Michigan! The Feeling Forever!

I like to pretend that I'm a famous blogger and that for the last two weeks my readers have been wondering why I haven't posted anything. But the reality is that the people who read this blog know where we've been - Grand Rapids and Chicago. So for the Chicago crowd, here's what we did in Michigan (tomorrow's post will be for the Michigan crowd, OK?).

We were able to see a Dance Guild performance which was a real treat since the star of the show is are very own, Mallory Feyen. This year we even got to go back stage to see some of the behind the scenes action before the show started. Shani was really excited about this.


We were also able to celebrate Halloween in Grand Rapids which was really fun. This was Hadley's first "official" Halloween. She really wanted to be a monkey, and thankfully there was a monkey costume at Target. (No, I don't make my kids' costumes. I wish I could, but anyone who has ever tried to teach me how to sew, knit, crochet, whatever, is no longer my friend.) The rest of the family wanted to get in on the Halloween fun, so we dressed up, too.

Nice looking group, huh? Jesse's a baby. He is sporting a really nice sleeper that my brother got him for Christmas last year. Surprisingly, Jesse has gotten a lot of use out of this thing. I am Olivia. You know, the pig? From the children's book? Harper is supposed to be a diva construction worker. We put her in overalls, and Jesse tied ribbons to a set of Hadley's play tools, and attached them to a belt. We also got the cutest little boots for her, but Harper would have none of it. Harper HATES wearing shoes and socks. She hates it with a passion. We're thinking of looking into some kind of therapy.

Here's the crew getting ready for trick-or-treating. I have an outstanding video of Jesse walking in his dinosaur sleeper, but I'm pretty sure he'll kill me if I post it, so you'll just have to imagine it. It really does rival the Magnum P.I. costume a few years back.

Getting ready to knock on the door....

Hadley didn't quite understand the concept at first, but once she saw got the hang of it, she really got into the idea that knocking on people's doors and saying, "Trick or treat!" led to getting candy. In fact, she was the last to come in the house. Here's a video of my happy monkey singing happily while trick or treating:




After trick-or-treating, Hadley and her cousin Maria decorated cupcakes for everyone.


And Harper loved them!

She loves her Aunt Mallory, too.

While we were in Michigan, we had a chance to see my cousin Tara and her beautiful family. Cole and Chase tried to show the girls how to play Dance, Dance Revolution.
They thought the mat was really cool:

Harper loved playing with blocks with Cole and Chase:

And Hadley enjoyed doing puzzles (one of her favorite past times) with Tara and Chase.

On our last day in GR, we had a chance to walk around Calvin for a bit. The school has made a lot of changes, and it was pretty impressive to take a look around. It is always fun for me to go back to Calvin because it made such a difference in my life....despite how long it took me to appreciate being there.

We also had a nice dinner with friends at Rose's on Reeds Lake. This area is my favorite part of Grand Rapids.

This is Valerie's son Joshua with his dad, Paul. I just told Joshua that he had to take Harper to the PROM, so you can understand his expression.

And Hadley had a very good time sitting next to Elisa, our friend Todd and Rhonda's daughter. Hadley kept calling her "Elisya" because that is Diego's sister. She was a little confused when I told her that Elisa was not Diego's sister, but that she was, however, Seth's sister.

We had a great week in Michigan, and were happy we could make the trip out to see our friends and family.

Tell Her This

My favorite memory of Hadley's first birthday happened to have nothing to do with anything that I planned for that day. For some reason or another, Hadley wasn't keen on taking naps that day, and I was pretty flustered about that (as many might know, I don't do well AT ALL when the routine falls apart). After about what felt like 40 years of hearing her scream in her crib, I decided I'd take her and get out of the house for a bit. So we went to the Washingtonian Center.

I got a coffee at Barnes and Noble, and strolled Hadley around the store for a bit. It was a nice day, so I walked her around the little lake (pond? I don't know what it is.), and after a bit realized she was sound asleep. I found a bench, sat down, and grabbed a book out of the diaper bag. A restaurant nearby had its music coming out from speakers outside and the song "Tell Her This" by Del Amitri was playing. It's a sweet song, and listening to it brought me back to the days when I had it on just about every cassette tape I'd ever dubbed then titled "My Driving Mix." (Yes, I did just write "cassette tape" and "dubbed.") The lyrics can't completely be turned into a mother's song for her child, but there are a lot of words in the song that are applicable for how I feel about Hadley. It was a nice moment to sit there, listen to the song, and watch Hadley sleep.

I kept thinking about that moment this weekend because a lot of what I had planned for Hadley's third birthday didn't work out. Both of the girls were sick, so we cancelled the birthday party. It rained all day on Saturday, so we couldn't go to the parks we had planned to go to. But there were a lot of sweet things that did happen, and I'm not sure I would've recognized them if I hadn't recalled Hadley's first birthday two years ago.

Hadley woke up coughing terribly early Friday morning. I went into her room to get her and she was a little upset and confused. She sat on my lap in the living room for a bit, and said, "Mommy, I can't go back to sleep because I'm coughing." I told her that was OK. I said, "I'm glad you're up because today is your birthday!" Hadley, who has been working and working to hold up three fingers for some time now, showed me her hand of three and said, "I turned three?"

"Yea! You are three years old today!" I confirmed.

"Uno, dos, tres?" she asked.

"Yes!" I exclaimed. "Do you want your first present?"

Hadley and I went to the kitchen and I gave her a bowl of Apple Jacks cereal and a juice box. I must say, I will miss the days when juice boxes and fun cereal are considered presents. Anyway, she and I sat on the kitchen floor in front of the dishwasher and lined up the alphabet magnets in order while she ate her breakfast.

Later that morning, the girls and I went to the park and then out to lunch. And Jesse came home early Friday so we could have a birthday party. I made macaroni and cheese (and I ate it, too!), broccoli, and blueberries. All of Hadley's favorites. And for dessert I made a chocolate cake with pink frosting at the request of Hadley. (Baking the cake was a story in and of itself, but there isn't time to write about it here. I'll just say that I made frosting for cookies instead of frosting for cakes, and wouldn't you know it, it doesn't frost the same.)







And of course there were presents.

Hadley doesn't quite understand that it's OK to rip the paper off of the present. Opening presents with her is like trying to perform open heart surgery. Everything has to be done a certain way.

A piggy bank from Grandma and Grandpa Lewis:
Hadley loves Mickey Mouse, or Goofy, to be more accurate. Have I written about Hadley's love for Goofy yet? I can't remember if I have. Her reaction to seeing or talking about Goofy is something I have never seen with Elmo, or Diego. At first I was a little disappointed in her choice of men because, Goofy? Seriously? I understand losing interest in Elmo but what about Grover? And at least Diego saves animals. But then I started thinking about the cartoons I watched and I think I had a little crush on Ichabod Crane. He's sort of like Goofy. Just a little darker.


Later that weekend, Geoff and Kellee came to celebrate, and we were able to hit a couple of parks which is Hadley's favorite thing to do.

On Sunday morning, I told Hadley that I happened to be at the "little park" (the park in our complex) and found a letter to her from Goofy. We read it together and she learned that he was on his way to wish her a Happy 3rd Birthday, but got distracted at the park (it's just so Goofy, isn't it?). As he was sliding down the slide, all the presents he brought for her fell out of his pockets. He asked Hadley if she would go and find them at the park. So that's what we did.






Hurray Goofy.

We were able to make it to Hadley's favorite park, Adventure Park. This park is really cool, but I can't take both the girls there because someone needs to climb all the things Hadley climbs, and I can't do that while leaving Harper in the stroller. So it's a real treat to be able to go with other adults. Let me rephrase that. It's a real treat to go with adults who are willing to climb after my daughter while I sit on a bench.

On the swings with Uncle Geoff.

Going down the slide with Geoff and Kellee. Look at that smile. Pure bliss, I tell you.
"Driving" with Geoff.
I LOVE this picture:
Typing this up, and looking at the pictures I can tell Hadley had a good time over the weekend. But I felt bad that the plans I made didn't work out, plus I was totally sleep deprived on Sunday because we had been up with Harper for a couple of hours. It is easy for me to focus on my precious plans and not having enough sleep, but if I do that too much I miss out on enjoying the good things like eating breakfast on the floor with your 3 year old daughter while playing with alphabet magnets. Or watching her face as she opens presents. Or hearing her say, "I LOVE that cake, Mama! Thank you!" Or this:


I can't really explain why it was a special moment that Harper's seat was turned around, but for me it was a big deal, so I needed to take a picture of it. Once again proving that no matter what I think might happen with the day, there are things my girls do that bring joy and excitement to my days that I could never plan for.

First Field Trip

Hadley went on her first field trip yesterday, and I was able to tag along with her and take a LOT of pictures. We went to Butler's Orchard, which is near where we live, and it was a lot of fun. Hadley even got to ride a school bus!
The school bus was a little late in arriving, so the teachers were keeping the kids busy in the classroom while we waited. They were reading books with the kids and there was lots of singing. When the teacher asked what song everybody wanted to sing, Hadley immediately shouted, "THE ABC's!"



The girls on Hadley's left and right are her two best friends in the class. Hadley talks about these girls all the time, and her teacher confirmed to me in our conference last week that these three are buds. The little girl on the right had Hadley's heart when she sang the ABC's with her one day. The Alphabet Song is Hadley's favorite song. It's not just a song, it's a mantra. And Hadley likes the girl on the left so much that she wants me to dress up like her for Halloween.

Once the bus driver got to the school, the excitement really picked up. I think this was probably more the case for the parents then it was for the kids. This was the first time anyone's kid was going to be on a bus. I don't know if we parents were more nervous or excited, but we could've competed for a paparazzi job in this moment. Cameras were flashing from the way down the hall, outside the school, down the sidewalk, walking up to the bus, and (for some) going INSIDE the bus. When I saw one mother walk out of the bus with her camera, I said, "Oh man, I totally should've done that!" I did get a short video of Hadley walking into the bus:




Once the kids were in the bus, the parents were sort of just smiling and standing around, me included. It just seemed like one of those moments when you need to reflect on what just happened. I don't know why getting on a bus for the first time is as big a deal as learning to walk, or riding a bike, or even graduating from college but it is. So the parents stood there for a moment until someone shouted, "We need to follow it!" And then we scrambled like crazy people, keeping an eye on the bus but also saying things like, "I'm not even sure how to get there!" "Are the kids safe in there? Do they have seatbelts on?"
I was so wound up I had to turn my radio to the classical station so I could concentrate on what I was doing. The bus was out of my sight before I could get out of the parking lot, but I was in the enormous caravan that was trailing behind.

I have always been somewhat reverent of school buses. It's probably the teacher in me, but I always thought it was a special thing to see a school bus full of kids driving around town. And I have always thought it takes a very special person to be a bus driver. I couldn't do it because I have the patience of a hungry lion. And I can't stand screaming kids. Or smelly bologna sandwiches. However, at the moment I was taking this picture, I was thinking how thankful I am that someone took the time to make a rule up about stopping traffic when a bus is stopped with its lights flashing and stop sign out. Or that the tops of the buses are painted white with their numbers on it in black letters.
But on to the field trip.

First order of business, a hayride.
I took these pictures for the Feyen side of the family so they could see that we were on John Deere tractors. I don't know anything about farming, but I know from living in Michigan for a bit that John Deere tractors are a big deal. Kind of like Jimmy Choo shoes.




They had Halloween scenes every few feet that I thought were so cute.
Hadley wasn't so sure about the hayride as documented here:

I think she was just taking it all in, but the fact that she was holding my hand says a lot.
The hayride took us to a pumpkin patch where we got to pick out two pumpkins to take home.

Hadley was much more excited about pushing the cart that held the pumpkins.

After the pumpkin patch we had a chance to explore the rest of Butler's Orchard, so we played in the hay for awhile.

We looked at little pigs, roosters, bunny rabbits, goats, and sheep.


Right after these pictures were taken one of Hadley's classmates got stung by a bee. It wasn't the greatest way to end an otherwise fun field trip, but like most 2 and 3 year olds, this girl bounced back when she found out she got to go on the bus again. So all in all, it was a great first field trip.

The Party Before the Party

On Saturday we celebrated our friend Chloe's first birthday together with her parents. I think I mentioned this before, but Chloe's mom, Erika, was my RA my Freshman year at Calvin. They moved to this area about a year ago and it has been a lot of fun hanging out with them ever since.

I was a little nervous about how Hadley would behave at Chloe's party because we've been talking so much about Hadley's upcoming birthday (for those of you who don't have my daughter's birthday written down on your calendars, Hadley's turning THREE this Friday). When I told Hadley we were going to a birthday party for Chloe, Hadley right away asked two things: 1)How old is Chloe, and 2) can we get her a present. She also wanted to know if there would be balloons there, and I said we'd have to wait and see (and made a mental note to make sure there are balloons at Hadley's party).

Here are the three girls playing with - A BALLOON! Looking at the picture, I'm a little concerned my girls are a little too excited about the balloon and forgot that the birthday girl is sitting right next to them. Chloe's probably thinking, "I don't think I'll be having these crazies over again anytime soon."

Chloe is trying to talk to Harper about what it feels like to be 1. Harper still has a few weeks before she hits single digits, so she needs to listen to Chloe and understand what her responsibilities are as a 1 year old.

Here's the birthday girl waiting for a cupcake from Cake Love.

She doesn't quite understand what how delicious these cupcakes are. Erika put a puff on it to try and get Chloe to taste it, but Chloe wasn't too interested. I remember that's how Hadley reacted on her first birthday as well.

It was a fun night, regardless of who had a cupcake, and we were glad to be a part of it.

On Sunday the four of us went to Target in the afternoon to get some odds and ends for Halloween costumes, and birthday party goodies. I won't tell you what each of us is going to be for Halloween, but I will say that out of the four of us, Jesse is the most excited to have a chance to dress up. And I will also say that his costume borders on being more insane then the Magnum P.I. incident of '03.

We were putting shoes on Harper, when Hadley spotted a pair of glittery red ballet flats. It was just about the time when we were ready to move on to other parts of the store, so Jesse said, "OK, let's get going." And Hadley said, "Let me just try these shoes on, and you can tell me how I look, Daddy."

As a mother, you hope for these kinds of moments. You take your daughter shopping, you try and express the excitement of picking out a great pair of shoes, or a great fitting pair of jeans. You know, you model this behavior. But you just never really know if it's going to sink in. Yesterday I realized that I'm doing an OK job.